Vice City is Strange
Welcome back to Aria's Corner. I'm Aria 🌷 and today I'm talking about...
Vice City... and how it's more of a strange fever dream than this neon-lit cityscape.
Here We Go Again (wait that's San Andreas 🤦♀️)
Alright, let me just... stretch my fingers. I've had too much cold brew and exactly one chewy oatmeal cookie that crumbled down my top like wet sand... so if I start rambling, well... yeah, that's just where we're at.
Anyway.
GTA 6 is looming over next year... well, after the double delay but... I mean, I'm still expecting at least another delay before an actual release 🥱. But everyone seems to be... pretty stoked for a third return to those beautiful sun-kissed shores of Vice City. And they have every right to be. Like who wouldn't love all that neon, pink flamingoes, and pumping synthwave music? Though, we gotta remember, GTA VI is gonna be modern day Vice City. Not that glorious 80s dreamland of the last two Vice City games.
Anywho, this takes us right to my point... and I'm just going to say it like it is... most people remember Vice City wrong 😬.
We can hear that perky yet classy guitar riff of the original Vice City's opening. The sky skies and crystal clear ocean 🌊. Speedboats and motorcycles (how in the heck did they not have those in GTA III?). And of course, those neon lights.
But the actual place? It's actually weird 🫤.
Like, "I just walked behind a building and found a field the size of Rhode Island and nothing's in it except a single palm tree that looks ashamed of itself" weird 🌴.
Let's talk about that. Because with GTA 6 dragging us back to Vice City *cough* Miami *cough*... I've been replaying the old one, and the vibe is so off-kilter and accidental that it's kinda gorgeous. Reminds me why it's a masterpiece that everyone loves to love. Like someone spilled the map halfway through development and went, "eh, close enough."
Neon Lies
Okay, look, the neon is great. It is. Really. Ocean Drive at night—those 80's hotels glowing like radioactive sherbet... I can't even pretend that my brain doesn't like what it sees 😊. When you see that place all lit up like that... I dunno, it just makes you feel good... you know? You get that rush, that "oh damn, I want a pineapple cocktail and a bad idea" sensation. I get it. This is top class gaming.
But... that part is like, 10% of the game 👀.
The other 90%? I mean no disrespect to Mr Vercetti when I say this but... The rest of the game is basically low-fidelity Miami—I mean Vice City—suburbs, weird warehouses, and beaches so empty they might as well be waiting for a murder to happen.
Yet, I can't help myself... I honestly just love everything about this place. The messiness... the completely contrasting neon view with desolate beaches...
Vice City was my first GTA, and its also the first GTA where I ever felt truly lonely. Not sad lonely—more like... How can I put this? It feels like a "I'm in the wrong part of town and even the textures don't want to be here" kind of lonely lonely.
Alright... that doesn't really make sense. I hear you. But also... you know what I'm getting at, right? It's a kinda liminal loneliness, where everything's kinda there but you feel like you shouldn't be there... Like you should only be in the lit up area of the city... yet you can still go and explore these other areas that feel unfinished and like they're from some other time. Like a strange kinda time capsule... yeah, I think that's how I'd describe it. A strange time capsule.
There's something real there. Something human. Maybe even poetic (even if by accident)... like the smell of of an old motel room that hasn't been cleaned for a while.
I should stop sniffing things 😛.
Anyway...
The Empty Secret Sauce
People act like video game cities need to be dense to feel alive. No better example than that exhausting phase gaming went through with open world games. GTA probably started it, most definitely made it popular. It became a standard. But then standards breed clones, where all the game studios start trying to fit themselves into that standard.
It's not always a bad thing though. I mean, that's how games like Skyrim, Arkham, Assassins Creed (AC), and Witcher were born and found their way 😊. Of course, each with their own takes and gimmicks. It's a messy world, right?
Unfortunately, companies can take it too far... like AC introducing larger and larger worlds. All in a bid for a more realistic and worthwhile immersive experience. Then they started doing this for most of their games, so Watch Dogs followed suit. They even tried to have the most NPCs on screen with AC:Unity. Cool spectacle. Sorta did make the world feel alive but then to compensate for the heavy load, each NPS lacked a personality. Interactions weren't as fun. Me personally? I woulda focused more on fixing the input on of their revolutionary parkour system. I mean Unity looked slick and smooth as butter but actually playing it? You're kinda pressing buttons then waiting for the animations to catch up 😬.
Of course, they tend to go too far as we've seen with AC:Origins and its sequels that rebooted the series and started cloning Witcher RPG mechanics. It happens. It's just another selling point, same as the constant war on graphics. But then you end up just paying for hours of padded, grindy, copy-paste content 😞. Who wants that? Not me.
But Vice City? It's different. It thrived... accidentally—on emptiness. Huge empty lots. Shacks in the middle of the ocean. Parking garages that echo like liminal purgatory. Some decisions intentions, of course. But others? Clearly they didn't plan on some things...
Seems to me that, they didn't intentionally do the stuff that made Vice City so memorable and different. It was a result of the limitations that they were working with. Heck, they didn't even have their own game engine at the time... They were using what other companies were using.
Consoles like the PS2 were the standard. And back then, they were considered powerful. But by today's standards, they're low-powered. But those limitations... they meant less detailed textures, less NPCs... yet somehow that kinda created the whole atmosphere of Vice City 😊. That and the fact that they seemed to have poured most of their resources into that neon lit strip as a standout feature... Which obviously left the rest of the city lacking yet all that more interesting. It gave Vice City character. And it's the type of character you just can't get in today's gaming industry unless some indie dev is going all outta their way to make it happen. And more power to 'em if they do 💪.
So... Rockstar didn't design these places to be aesthetic. They just didn't have time or the resources. Gotta remember, they were still a sorta small, up-and-coming games studio. Plus they were trying to quickly follow up their groundbreaking hit, GTA III. So no wonder Vice City was thrown together in nine months flat. That's barely long enough to grow a baby, let alone a virtual crime empire. Yet it flourished... 😊
Sadly for us, it's a far cry from their more modern games. I mean they did fantastically with the RAGE engine for GTA IV 💪, which they refined for RDR1. But then they dumbed it down for GTA V and RDR2. They also leant more into realism and immersion than fun. You only need to look at the extremely detailed trees that took months of work to create, which is obvious with how they're affected any nearly everything in the game. Also gun and horse maintenance. That was a thing. Those weren't fun. They're realistic, absolutely. But fun? Nope.
So... what else made Vice City so iconic? Maybe it was... that frantic rush to pump out a followup to their wildly successful almost one-hit-wonder, GTA III. And maybe that rush, combined with the limitations... gave the world a kind of jagged beauty that we can all still appreciate today.
I mean sometimes, I'd find myself wandering around the game... asking myself random questions (I promise I'm not entirely crazy 😅, just the good amount 😛). Like, "why is this alley here?" or "why is the mall ceiling basically a void?" or "why is that one dude standing at a hot dog stand at 3 a.m. wearing a swimsuit?" Okay, the dude in that last one might've just had really specific priorities...
It's kinda magical if I just leave it at that. But of course, the reason the game had that charm is because something got in the way. Someone didn't have time to smooth things out. Or the tech just wasn't up to the job and couldn't do what they wanted it to. And honestly? Thank god 😄.
Why? We need games with rough edges. Little tears in the curtain where you can peek through and see something you probably shouldn't. It feels... honest. Real. You know? Not in some classy moral way—gotta remember these games are literally named after a crime that you virtually perform, repeatedly—but honest in the sense that you can feel the flaws of the people behind it. People were involved. They weren't perfect... Technology was primitive by our standards. Heck DLC's weren't really a thing in those days. No distractions from social media... I guess that's a whole other post but... man, what a time it was to be alive back then, huh? 😊
Still... those people who were probably chugging late-night coffee and eating whatever the 2000s equivalent of a microwave ready meal was. And in the process? They made gaming history 🫡.
The Walking Anamatronics
Vice City NPCs are my favorite disaster.
They walk like animatronics that need WD-40. No wonder Five Nights At Freddy's did so well. They spawn in front of you like bored ghosts 👻. They sometimes kill each other for absolutely no reason.
And then—this is the part that gets me—they gather around the body like they're trying to help 😂. But... of course, they don't know how. It's weird in the way a broken Roomba is. And I love it 🤣.
I don't get that feeling from GTA 5. In 5, the illusion is too good. NPCs feel like polished props. You see them, but you never see through them. I mean, up close... there's still something not entirely human about them so they're still strange. But the character? The charm? All gone.
Vice City NPCs? You can practically hear them think. "Error: Sadness. But also walking. Continue walking." Or "Collided with car. PAIN. But also RAGE." This is it. One of those things that makes the game actually fun and memorable. It's becoming a rarer and rarer experience nowadays 😞.
I mean, of course being an early open-world game is technically impressive in itself, and the novel emergent behaviors would've blown anyone's mind back in the day. What can I say? They were impressive 🤯. The whole package. But being a game full of character... that's gotta mean something. And... it does. People still remember the game vividly and fondly. It's kinda what's driving the hype for GTA 6, or at least I hope it is... no body needs games to stray even further from the point 😬.
Filthy and Beautiful
Here's my take, I guess—if I have to have one... I keep losing track like I lose pens... Do people even use those anymore? But back to the point...
Vice City works because it's inconsistent.
I don't mean "quirky indie game" inconsistent. Or broken. That'd be a mixed bag. No... I mean "partially finished diorama someone left out in the sun for way too long" inconsistent. Like, there was clearly a grand plan for the game. It just... didn't work out entirely like that 😅.
Perfect interiors right next to ghost-town fields. It paints a picture... Mall shops with lovingly detailed low texture record sleeves right next to doors, sized for hobbits. A donut shop that somehow looks like an abandoned dentist's office. There's a charm. And it's undeniable, and kinda unapologetic about it too (psst, that's a good thing 😉).
It's accidental art. It has an imperfect texture. It has... dunno how to put this but... feeling. Cringe? Yeah. Cliche? Sure. But you might as well call me the queen of cringe, because I like it AND it works 😜.
It's not really the neon lights that people remember. I mean sure, that's the seller... a neat package for your mind to grab. But the actual charm? It's real grit and substance. Weird stuff. And ones that stick.
It's kinda like going back to a childhood vacation spot and realizing the glamorous hotel you remember so fondly... actually had a moldy old carpet and smelled of smoke and spiced rum. But... you remember eating chewy cookies while watching the sunset through some grimy windows. It was filthy. But it was beautiful. So in a way, it mattered in all the ways that actually count 😊.
That is Vice City.
So What About GTA 6?
So... look, I can't hide my excitement for this game. Even if it turns out to be a flop, I'm still gonna be excited. I can't help it. Like so many other gamers out there, GTA is a part of my childhood. And of course, it's a major staple of gaming history. Like we both know that it literally shaped the entire genre of open-world games. It presented this sculpture that became a standard for what 3D third-person games are. And they've kept refining that formulae for better or worse.
But... we gotta temper expectations. Drop that hope bar a little... Rockstar doesn't do accidental anymore. They're big boys now. Everything is intentional. Everything is polished. There's gonna be a lot of focus on being modern, realistic, immersive. And... I can't lie to you... it's gonna clash with what we gamers loved about the original Vice City. Heck even it's sequel (Vic was a cool dude). So... this (three-quel?) game isn't likely to match what we're expecting. I'm gonna just accept that, and you might wanna too 😉.
I mean... yeah, we'll get beautiful beaches, and neon hotels, and probably seven thousand TikTok clips of players dancing on yachts. There's gonna be a heck of a lot of realism too. Think even more detailed news, interactive and widespread in-game social media. And a ton of improvements. I mean, we've all seen the ambient lighting and hair physics right?
But part of me hopes—stubbornly—that they let things be a little messy. A little strange. A little unfinished around the edges. Because to me, that's what made Vice City feel like a place, not a trailer. Speaking of, how many more trailers are we gonna have to sit through before the delays let up? I mean, I know the delays are basically a meme at this point...
But yeah... if they sidestep the messy stuff? Well... We'll always have that awkward donut shop and its lone cashier who apparently works everywhere in the GTA (classic? retro?) universe. Dude needs a union. Or a raise 😛.
Wrap It Up
I should probably end this post with something smort before I drift into another tangent about the smell of Miami airport carpets (I'm getting hints of coconut sunscreen at the moment 😜).
So... Vice City wasn't some neon paradise. Though it had fantastic music. Such a killer soundtrack...
It was inconsistent, strange, and empty in the way dreams are... and that's what made it wonderful.
If GTA 6 can capture even a sliver of that accidental magic, I'll be happy. But if it doesn't, I'm still grateful for the strange, glitchy, weirdly haunting version we already have (the remake is whole other post though 😬). And you know I'll be replaying it if the three-quel flops.
Alright, that's enough out of me. My coffee's cold and my cookie crumbs are sticking to my elbow somehow...
Til next time. Your friend, Aria 🌷